A Balanced Approach to Wellness!

Archive for the ‘Sustaining activities’ Category

Sleep and its issues

No Sleep

“Sleep is essential. Sleep is the second-most important need of the body, after water and before food. Sleep must be scheduled and must be regular. Each person’s need of continuous nighttime sleep fluctuates with age, occupation, and location. Each person should understand his or her sleep requirements and be mindful to fulfill them.”

– from “Behavior & Release” in Pond a Connected Existence

“During sleep, the body recharges, repairs, restores, and rethinks. Sleep can make or break us, depending on its quality. Here are general tips for better sleep:

  • Sleeping posture is very important. The spine needs to stretch out so don’t curl up into a ball.
  • Going to sleep hungry or going to sleep too full contribute to less satisfactory sleep. Make sure that you are sufficiently un-hungry before you get into bed. If you are too full, put off sleep for an extra 45 minutes.
  • Going to sleep before handling feelings that are negative (anger, hurt, or annoyance) can lead to unsettled sleep. If you cannot let go of the negative feelings before going to sleep, be sure to stretch your body when you get into bed and point-and-flex your toes for a few moments. Loosening your body in bed can help you release negativity before sleep.
  • The well-known tactic of writing a To-Do list for tomorrow is a wise move. Be sure to write the list at least an hour before bedtime so your mind does not continue to think about your upcoming tasks.
  • The less light in the room, the better. If you can sleep in complete darkness, then your body will be able to handle its restorative work more completely. This tip also applies to children. Night lights are for the parents more than they are for the children.
  • If you wake up in the night, don’t assume you won’t be able to go back to sleep. Assume that you will, and you usually will.
  • If you wake up tired, try going to bed earlier, lessening stimulants (if you use them), and getting more physical exercise.

These tips are generalizations because each person’s sleep issues are personal. Sleep trouble is influenced by lack of balance including incorrect nutrition, lack of exercise, going to sleep troubled, going to sleep scared, using stimulants, noise, convoluted days (working at night and sleeping during the day), too much stimulation close to bedtime, sleep posture, and temperature in the bed. If you can address these issues, then your sleep should improve.”

– from “Vitality! Sleep Requirements” in Vitality!— How to Create a Life That Is Healthy

Why do we need spiritual connection?

Post 92-spiritual connection

  • We need spiritual connection because our lives are insignificant without it.
  • We need spiritual connection to help us weather stormy and difficult times.
  • We need spiritual connection when nature overcomes us with its beauty or its fearsomeness.
  • We need spiritual connection as a means to fathom life and death.
  • We need spiritual connection if we are lonely or hurt.
  • We need spiritual connection filling our lives with purpose, elevation, and reason for striving.

Spiritual connection can be found on one’s own or in a group. The main thing to know about spiritual connection is that it is available to all equally. No group has a claim on higher access to spiritual connection.

People who dedicate themselves to spiritual connection at the expense of connecting to the people around them are not living spiritual connection correctly. Spiritual connection is not an excuse for turning one’s back on the needs of other people.

Spiritual connection can be a way to understand the world around if we can see the spirituality in all living things.

Spiritual connection fills the world with beauty, drama, and interactions.

Spiritual connection is the basis for ethical and caring treatment of all living things, including people.

Overcoming Disappointment


“Deserving” one thing and receiving something else brings on a bout of disappointment.

“Deserving” is an interesting word. We want many things, and the wanting can cause a sense of entitlement. When the feeling of deserving overshadows reality, the feeling of disappointment is close by.

Wanting something can also lead to disappointment if the fulfillment of the wants depends on someone else’s actions. Wanting carries expectations, and expectations have within them the seeds of disappointment.

Wanting someone else to do something for us or wanting someone else to say wonderful things to us or wanting someone else to give us just the right thing or wanting someone else to recognize our needs or wanting someone else to … (and so the list goes).

The expectation of certain actions or words or gifts or responses or outcomes brings disappointment whenever the expectation causes sadness. Sadness is the root of disappointment.

We learn to be disappointed; it is not a natural feeling. We learn it from promises unkept, from advertisements that create impossible results, from friendships betrayed, and from hopes thwarted. When we learn disappointment at an early age, it can sabotage future relationships and endeavors. Events outside ourselves influence our living, and when these events bring sadness, they deafen our resistance to feelings of self-pity. The sadness can become disappointment by self-pity becoming self-righteousness.  Believing that we deserved something or needed it very much builds the disappointment so that it overshadows outcomes that are fine. The fine aspects of life get forgotten and the disappointments come more easily.

What can we do to overcome disappointments?

Our perceptions influence our feelings of satisfaction or disappointment. Our experiences influence them as well. Accepting that perceptions and experiences have enabled disappointment to affect our viewpoints is the first step.

Here are other steps that can lessen the grasp of disappointment:

  • Smile at regular intervals. For example, smile when you arise and when you get out of bed, when you get dressed and when you put on your shoes, when you start eating your first meal of the day and when you have finished it, and while doing obligatory beginning-of-the-day routines, movements, or chores.
  • Practice surprise! Young children live surprise day in, day out. They gawk at animals, flowers, and brightly colored boxes. They experience wonder when they experience daily living. Surprise is their constant companion. As children age, societal pressures to conform destroy the surprise feelings. To bring back feelings of surprise, purposely look at things around your home that you really like and notice how you feel when you look at them. To encourage feelings of surprise, marvel at the mundane things in your life (like curtains, kitchen utensils, and dirt in the garden).
  • Don’t let feelings of disappointment fester. When you notice these feelings, push your stomach in and out several times and then consider why you are feeling this way. If your disappointment is at yourself, acknowledge your part in bringing about your current situation. If your disappointment is at someone else, let yourself be distracted by other things. If your disappointment is at an event that wasn’t to your expectation, force yourself to move on.
  • Find a volunteer cause that you can help and give time to the cause. Donating money is not giving time. Actually spend time helping the cause.

We can unlearn being disappointed. It’s worth the time and effort to banish disappointment from our lives!

Worshipping the Famous? Why? And How Not!

red carpet

The antics of the well known are followed slavishly. People follow their twitters, swear by their lifestyle advice, and search out juicy tidbits about them.

The well-known celebrities and celebrity-idols tantalize with their talents and distance with their successes. The well-known have larger than life personas so that their doings seem more important than the doings of non-famous people. Their relationships and choices sparkle (or so it seems) and their thoughts fascinate (more than our own).

Why do we worship the famous?

  • Because we are overloaded (too many distractions and too many expectations).
  • Or because we are lacking fascinating goals of our own.
  • Or because we are afraid to develop our own talents.
  • Or because we are discouraged by the words of others who dashed our dreams.

Turning away from ourselves and directing our attention on well-known people releases our expectations of ourselves and cancels our interesting factor (we don’t have to be interesting). The fascinating people–the celebrities and celebrity-idols–receive our potential, and we live live through them.

How can we stop idolizing the celebrities?

Holding onto celebrity fixations is not necessary when fixation on ourselves and on the real people in our lives happens. Here are three ways to release celebrity idolization:

  1. Remove the overloading distractions. These include irrelevant gadgets, extra stuff in your house, and celebrity publications (online and print).
  2. Focus on personal goals and relationships.
  3. If unrealized dreams can be realized, let yourself release the words or actions that held you back. (This step might require assistance from therapeutic counsel.)

Worshipping the famous is focus overwhelmed. Each person has focus for his or her own abilities and for influences that extend these abilities. Focusing on someone else’s abilities diminishes possibilities to extend one’s own abilities.

Celebrity and celebrity-idol fixation brings little that is positive for a balanced life. Letting that attention-thief go is best!

The Enlightened Way to Drive

Electric car

Driving is enormous. When we drive, we become larger than we were meant to be. The larger the vehicle, the smaller we actually are.

Encasing ourselves in a metal machine causes us to be effectors. We can affect movement and we can bring destruction. We can also soar.

Defensive driving is critical because it prevents destruction. Enlightened driving is defensive driving uplifted. It requires awareness, compassion, and gratitude. Enlightened driving is nourishing.

To drive with enlightened awareness

  • Breathe deeply at traffic lights and in traffic jams.
  • Look at the movement. Notice the movement of the traffic and the movement of your vehicle.
  • At overpasses and underpasses, sit up straight and think about your posture.

To drive with compassion

  • Consider the environment and reduce unnecessary driving to lessen your contribution to air pollution.
  • Consider the animals and people, and don’t leave your vehicle running unnecessarily.
  • Consider the vehicles around you. They protect their inhabitants as your vehicle protects you. Think of the inhabitants of the other vehicles as you think of inhabitants of your vehicle–all have significance.

To drive with gratitude

  • Before a drive, breathe deeply and say a thanks for your vehicle and for your ability to drive it.
  • During a drive, notice the working of your vehicle. If something feels or sounds off, get it checked. Notice the working of your body. If something feels off, breathe and then focus on your driving. If the feelings are painful, consider how to resolve them. If the feelings are mild, consider addressing them after the drive.
  • After a drive, breathe deeply and say a thanks for arriving safely. If there were moments of fear in your drive, also add a thanks for handling your fear. If there was risk or actual harm in your drive (to you or your vehicle), breathe deeply and save the thanks for when you feel grateful.

Enlightened driving can be applied by passengers in a vehicle and when riding on public transportation.

Driving with awareness and with compassion and with gratitude provides many opportunities for balanced living. Enormous are the benefits of enlightened driving–even more enormous than the enormity of driving!

(The car in the photo was an electric car that I once owned. Unfortunately it was ahead of its time, and the company that provided the electricity went out of business.)


soul connection

I have been underwater. Well, not literally. The last five weeks I have been in the US visiting family and friends, attending important family gatherings, and being not-Energy Guidance. I have submerged my connection to Spirit in order to fit in and be the person I used to be. That submersion of my true self has left me without words and without energy to share Spiritual wisdom. Now that I have returned home, I am slowly returning to the true person that is Renee Rothberg, voice of Energy Guidance.

A friend who reads my blog faithfully told me that she is waiting to hear my reactions to my time in the US. I reminded her that I write what Spirit directs me to write. I don’t write what I think, although I often, but not always, agree with Spirit. The words that appear in this blog are given to me; they are not my original thoughts. When you read the wisdom presented here, know that it is not from me but through me. Yes, through me.

Now that I am surfacing, I can sit quietly and receive. Here are the messages that Spirit wants me to share about my visit to my old life:

  • Environmental care should come before convenience. Think twice before using disposable plates, bowls, cups, etc.
  • Making time for family is nourishing and supportive. Even the folks that drive us crazy add to our well-being.
  • Airplanes are unnatural environments. Take care to be well-hydrated and well-nourished on flights. Be kind to the stewards and stewardesses and greet fellow travelers sincerely.
  • Trees are beautiful wherever we go. Taking time to notice them is as important as going to a tourist site.
  • Viewing people with a kind heart helps them be their true selves. Keep kindness before judgment.

Most of us know these wise pieces of advice, but we often forget to heed them. Knowing that they come from Beyond is helpful in remembering to follow them.

The Power of the Smile


The most powerful weapon that we all possess is the smile. It’s not our muscular strength or our quick witted tongue. The smile is the weapon of choice.

The smile disarms aggressive opponents. The smile acknowledges existence. The smile soothes sorrowful feelings. The smile releases tension.

Many studies have proven the health benefits of the smile. Study after study proves that we should smile more, even when we don’t feel like smiling.

So with all the research that has already proven the reasons for smiling more, what does Spirit want us to know? Here it is…

When we smile, our connection to strength is renewed. The strength of the smile makes us able to face life’s changes and ties us to all others.

Dis tr a c ting


Distracting colors

I should be working on activities for my next workshop and I should be immersed in one of the several books I am writing, but instead I let myself get distracted by Facebook and news stories about politicians and topics that have little meaning in my life. I get distracted by unimportant errands and Sudoku. I even focus on dusting rather than on the writing that is SO much more important.

You would think that I, with the constant prodding by Spiritual Presence, would stay focused, but no, I rebel and waste time. Even though I know how precious the passing time is! I guess I don’t really understand the meaning of this poem from Unfolding:

The Flash

Life is so quick—
Quickly over,
So quickly over.

Why don’t we notice?
Why don’t we realize?

Living fully
Is living life right!
Ready to attempt,
Ready to strive,
Ready to attempt again,
Ready to strive more.

Life is so quick—

Almost all of my spiritually received books remind me about the need to stay focused, and yet I “focus” on the wispy fluff*.

“There are temptations aplenty that lure and distract us. Staying focused on elevating pursuits is difficult. Our natural inclination is often to choose the less demanding option over the more rewarding, but harder-to-achieve, goal. Continuous bombardment by advertising and entertainment cause us to choose unwisely. The lure of gaiety wins out over its sober cousin, responsible selection of pastimes. So many worthwhile endeavors are waiting to be embraced, but the lightness and instantaneous nature of distracting endeavors deter. Learning to choose wisely is an important sign of understanding the importance of balance.”

This quote is from the chapter “Distractions Along the Way” in The Gift of Intuitive, Dedicated Comfort.

Perhaps writing a blog post about this waste of precious time will help me stay focused. I hope that my confession helps some of you too.

From Connection:

ticking tocking
on and on
the clock ticks on
and ticks some more

*wispy fluff was first defined in Pond a Connected Existence. It is empty and valueless time wasters. It is unimportant and un-elevating.

The World Uprooted—Applause Confusion

Post 13-screen beans supportingIn a world where applause is for beauty and celebrity is for ball kicking, uprootedness is occurring.

Applause should be for those who care for the animals and for the vegetation and for the vulnerable. Applause with enthusiasm should be for the people who deliver babies or deliver sustenance from family farms or deliver animals from cruel existence or deliver protection of nature from fires and floods.

Applause for people who strut down runways is applause confused. Applause for people who run after dementia-afflicted people is applause correct.

Applause for professional ball kickers or ball throwers is applause undeserved. Applause for professional arborists working in difficult climates is applause deserved.

Celebrity worship and star fixation are turning the world upside down. The stars become unreal—and suffer because of that—and the fixated lose focus of true values.

Each person who gives more value to an undeserving individual because of sports prowess or body size is contributing to the upside-down existence. Each person can help right the world by focusing on those who bring betterment. Each person can help right the world by allotting time to endeavors that correct misguided infatuations.

Let the celebrities and the sports stars and the models move back, and let the real applause-deservers shine!

Participating Meaningfully

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When we take part in uplifting community efforts, we become uplifted, we fulfill natural desire to be part of, and we are helping our bodies be well.

“Gathering together forges ties and friendships, support and community. Whether the occasion is happy or sad or tension filled or relaxed, gathering together leads to emotional release, emotional awareness, or emotional expression, even if the emotions are repressed or explosive. The importance of gathering in small groups or in larger arrangements is often overlooked.” from Pond a Connected Existence.

Gathering together, whether in a large or small group, is a natural way for people to live. Celebrations or school meetings, religious services or community clean-ups, all bring people together and all uplift. Gathering together for purposes that are degrading or destructive not only cause imbalances in the participants, but also cause a group sense of despair—even if the participants think that they enjoyed themselves.

The key for a gathering to create positive repercussions is that the gathering be a setting for appreciation and giving.

From generation to generation

family gathering photo

The passing of customs and traditions is what people do. The customs and traditions guide younger people in living that has been tested. The testing is done in each generation within the boundaries of the existing ways of being. By design, people are meant to learn from the ones who lived before. Each generation of parents and elders is needed to transmit information and teach dependable practices and reliable skills.

Relinquishing the responsibility to teach the younger generation is faulty. The younger generation cannot understand society and behavior without careful guidance. The guidance of elders provides stability and security.

When society is skewed in its actions and treatment of the environment, of animals, and of people, the passing of customs and traditions that are causing the skewed behavior require the questioning of the younger generation to bring change. In these cases, the younger generation influences the fixed behavior through insistent inquiry and debate. Change can develop when all the generations learn from one another in the generational way.

Here’s an interesting look at habits from the upcoming book of poetry titled “Connection”. This book will be published this summer.





(This blog post was posted over a year ago. I’ve been in some cluttered homes lately [including my own] and I’ve been prompted to remind everyone about the importance of unclutter. Happy decluttering!)

Clutter is an expression of unhappiness. When one’s things are managed in a haphazard way, the first thought should be “What am I unhappy about?” The answers can be surprising.

Causes of clutter

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about one’s choices—mate, work or profession, or simply one’s choices of possessions

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about the amount of stuff-too much stuff!

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about obligations—too many obligations to handle.

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about one’s current life presentation (in other words, the form of one’s daily life).

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about having more than one should—guilt over one’s excess gifted existence.

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about past choices made or past indecision.

Perhaps the clutter comes from unhappiness about the way in which spiritual .omnipotence meted out one’s circumstances.

Clutter is much bigger than it seems.

The cure for clutter

Since the causes are multi-layered, then so too is the cure. Choose one of these cures and if it only addresses parts of your issues, then choose another.

Cure #1: Consider your expectations of yourself. Consider your expectations of your past—did you expect too much from your caregivers or from other important people in your life? Forgive the caregivers who were too tired. Forgive yourself for taking on too much. Declutter one significant area, then observe this area and be proud and kind to yourself. Declutter a second significant area, then observe this area and be proud and kind to yourself. Continue in this fashion until you have decluttered the areas that deserve to be uplifting.

Cure #2: Write a list of all the choices you have made that have affected your clutter. Examine the list to gain insight. Keep the list in a place where you can see it regularly and address each item by decluttering the corresponding stuff. Continue in this fashion until you have decluttered the areas that deserve to be uplifting.

Cure #3: Join a close friend in a decluttering effort. Each of you discuss the choices that have led to your current state of unhappiness. Agree to a decluttering goal and either write it down and sign it or create a decluttering song that you can sing when you declutter your own stuff. Encourage one another. Feel kindly thoughts for the other when he or she succeeds in decluttering. Continue in this fashion until you have decluttered the areas that deserve to be uplifting.

Care for one’s possessions

In general, people living in modern open societies buy too many things. If you see that you cannot care for the things you own, consider relinquishing many of them. Also, if you find that you are spending a large percentage of your day caring for your possessions so that you are unable to meet with friends or family or are unable to give of your time for helping others, consider relinquishing the possessions that require too much care.

Partake or refuse


Government election. Partake or refuse?
Family gathering. Partake or refuse?
Community service. Partake or refuse?
Neighborhood mixing. Partake or refuse?
Time with friends. Partake or refuse?

Partake or refuse

The choice “Partake” builds connections and balance.

The choice “refuse” grants ease perhaps, but also less connection, balance, and support.

Partaking in societal efforts to create a supportive society delivers more to the people who take part than they realize. The nature of people is to connect and to become intertwined. Building together, whether in a small community or in a sprawling metropolis, supplies each person who takes part with memories and accomplishment.

The sense of accomplishment can be attained through endeavors that build one’s own family or oneself, and this sense of accomplishment is supportive, but is narrow. Accomplishment that builds support among community members is able to fill a person with beyond-self contentment.

The gift of memories that develop from communal involvement also fill a person with beyond-self contentment. Although memories of time spent in assisting with community betterment are personally uplifting, when combined with all community member having these memories, the entire populace of that area is infused with a sense of connected well-being.

Partake or refuse?
Better to partake!



What is fullness? I thought I feel it almost every time I eat, but Spiritual Presence informs me that I don’t feel it enough.

What fullness am I learning about?

The fullness one feels when seeing a dear, loved one. The fullness one feels when looking back upon one’s actions and being satisfied. The fullness one feels when letting the awesomeness of nature completely overwhelm. The fullness one feels when working with others to improve everyone’s surroundings. The fullness one feels when the amazingness of weather is experienced. The fullness one feels when welcoming a new life into one’s home or community.

Fullness is a sense of comfort, of appreciation, and of understanding. Fullness is satisfaction. Opening to self-contentedness is fullness.

The fullness we feel when we eat a sustaining, nutritious meal is this type of fullness.


Is happiness the goal?

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Is happiness the goal? Is monetary success the goal? Is recognition the goal? Is leadership the goal? Is applause the goal?

Happiness, monetary success, recognition, leadership, and applause are aspects of living, but they are not the goals of life. The goals of life are these:

  • Acknowledging the awe that exists in the natural world
    Accepting the limitations of our humanness
    Assisting others in overcoming their personal difficulties
    Overcoming personal difficulties
    Avoiding intentional damage to the environment
    Avoiding intentional damage to ourselves
    Protecting weaker species
    Guiding the future generations in the correct ways of living
    Assisting others in achieving spiritual awareness
    Creating warm and lasting relationships with family members
    Creating warm and lasting relationships with chosen friends

from The Gift of Intuitive, Dedicated Comfort.

These goals enable us to be connected to our surroundings, connected to our future, connected to our past, and balanced in our living. These goals steady our focus and guide our actions. These goals lead to contentment and understanding. These goals breathe.

Wanting to be happy is elusive, but wanting to have warm and lasting relationships is nourishing. Wanting monetary success is time-qualified, but wanting to provide for oneself and any dependents is time-extending. Having recognition brings a sense of accomplishment, but guiding future generations in the correct ways of living is true accomplishment. Leading is important, but accepting one’s limitations as a human being is required for true leadership abilities. Applause brings momentary excitement, but spiritual awareness and acknowledgement brings continuous amazement and passion.

Goals are necessary for productive and purposeful living. Large goals are like maps; smaller goals are like road signs. Each showing the way in a world that is unclear without them.


Post 107-entertainment

Music, art, slapstick, drama, literature, dance, and other forms of entertainment.  All are created by people for people. Experiencing entertainment is soul-fulfilling. Creating entertainment is soul exercise because the soul requires the stretch of the imagination and the melody of the breeze. Any form of entertainment that is awakening for the soul is soul exercise.

Music naturally fills the body and reaches the soul, especially for the people who are generating the music. Listening to others play music is enriching; actually playing the music is enriching at a deeper level. The act of making music is the catalyst for melody-absorption. The music does not need to be at a professional level; the music—however it is played—is like a key in the door to the soul. Listening, singing, strumming, blowing, drumming, bowing, snapping, clapping, whistling, or any other music-generating activity is absorbed into the intangible part of us.

Dance, like music, reaches the soul, especially when the dance is true to the person dancing.  Dancing from the heart, dancing from the gut, dancing from the sound of the music, dancing from the rhythm of the beat, dancing with abandon, dancing in one’s room or dancing in a group, dancing intently, dancing internally, dancing when dancing isn’t allowed, and dancing soulfully! Dance performed for others is soul-moving, especially for the dancers but also for the observers if the dance is authentically performed. Dancing in a group performing choreographed routines is exercise for the body, but not necessarily exercise for the soul; however, when a dance performance is choreographed from the heart, then the heartfelt movements can transfer to the performers and even to the observers.

Art is soulful exercise when the inspiration for the artistic expression is soul-awakening. Especially for the artist, but also for the viewer.

Entertainment is naturally built-in. People are drawn to others’ antics. People are drawn to others’ doings. The soul wants entertainment, and the best way to get it is to be entertaining. To oneself and to others!

Positive and negative positives-negatives

Post 7-bracelet

22 stones. One for each combination of positive-negative voices in our heads. Sort of like the good angel-bad angel depiction of our consciences. Sort of like how we feel when we are deciding between a sustaining activity that is a time investment and a non-sustaining activity that is a time distraction.

The list below is a partial list of positives-negatives.  Please feel free to add more.

1 good-bad
2 elevate-stay/descend
3 try-hold back
4 consider-discount
5 open-territorial
6 caring-disdain
7 charitable-judgmental
8 respect-disregard
9 prepare-neglect/ignore
10 retain-spread
11 me-others
12 others-me
13 accept-reject
14 act-accept
15 speak up-hold back
16 contribute-withhold
17 develop-abandon
18 patience-impatience
19 defend-withdraw
20 aid-hurt
21 support-sabotage
22 humility-vanity

Why we like prizes, freebies, and contests

Post 67-contests freebies prizes

Part of the human design is the pull towards the unknown. Working things out, discovering, learning. People are driven to explore and understand. And to master. People also tend to want new challenges after they have internalized previous challenges. Contests, freebies, and prizes are human ways of answering the need for the unknown and for the challenge.

Each person has a reason for entering a contest or vying for a prize or applying for a freebie. How does a freebie fit in? Because the wanting of a reachable-but-not-quite item or experience is a form of a challenge, albeit a minor one. The freebie-wanting is a way of working things out and mastering.

Also, people want entertainment. Another design feature! Contests, freebies, and prizes answer this need. Each in its own way entertains and interests.

The more one participates in contests and events that include prizes, the more one feels purpose, because the winning or placing or almost-winning or almost-placing satisfies a magnetic pull towards out-doing the unknown—changing the rules, creating a surprise ending.

Explore unknown (want ___ after ___ have )! Fill in the blanks and win a prize! Just kidding.

When a young person dies

Post 62-death

Yesterday, I learned that the unthinkable happened. A young woman on a hiking/adventure holiday died. She and one of my sons were in high school together, and I know her and her mother. The funeral will take place when her body arrives back home.

I have written about death a few times in my books, and I turn to them and to Spiritual Presence to find understanding and comfort.

From the Gift of Intuitive, Dedicated Comfort:

“Each day brings an opportunity to move up or down, to build or waste, and to affect or be affected.”

The message: this young woman was a person who involved herself in life. Not only in her travels, but in her relationships and in her community.

From Pond a Connected Existence:

“The moments accumulate and produce the picture that is one’s life.”

The message: She spent her moments in uplifting and sustaining activities. The picture that is her life is one filled with vibrant colors and multiple dimensions. (See my earlier post “Finding one’s way” that explains life pictures.)

“An event occurs that requires action. The timing of the event influences possible actions. The action(s) taken are influenced by capabilities, preparation, presence of resources, and decisions. Overall attitude pervades the process. Many parts for an outcome.”

The message: Whatever happened, happened because of her capabilities, preparation, presence of resources, decisions, and attitude. And timing. “Many parts for an outcome.”

From the chapter “Concrete Living” in Oneself-Living:

“Natural death is painful for the survivors, but because it is “natural” is easier to accept. Deaths through accidents, disasters (natural or not), struggles such as wars and territorial conflicts, or other human-handed causes are harder to digest. These deaths cause more lingering effects…

Movement is always linear, from start to finish… The body is born, lives, and dies…

Concrete living: living with gusto and with verve, with awareness of an ending and with awareness of possibility, with thankfulness and with generosity. “

The message: Those left behind, the ones who remember and despair, must be comforted and supported. They must be allowed to mourn and feel overwhelming sadness. The comforters must be patient and open to the mourners’ grief. Slowly, as time passes, the mourners will be pulled back into the world of living, because that is the natural flow of life. Death is the natural ending to life. It can be the end and it can be the catalyst for living with gusto and verve, opportunity and hope, and purpose and determination.

Finding one’s way

Post 60-finding ones way

Above you see the average life path. Below you see what the desired route should be:

Post 60-finding ones way2

Full of trials and successes and attempts and experiences.

And if the life is short, the route can be:

Post 60-finding ones way3

Short, but meaningful.

And what about a long life that is purposeful, balanced, and connected? This life’s picture would be:

Post 60-finding ones way4

“…Moment after moment after moment. The moments accumulate and produce the picture that is one’s life. Enriching moments are vibrantly colored; valueless moments are dull and unexceptional.

Fullness and not. Life can be full—or not. The picture that is one’s life has dimensions: smooth in places that are enriched, jagged in places that are unbecoming, two-dimensional in places where a choice was not made. The form of the picture can be SO large, one simply has to choose to be giving and engaged and willing to participate in a well-lived life. Life that is experienced through true living lights the way for others.”

…from the chapter “Moment” in Pond a Connected Existence.

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