A Balanced Approach to Wellness

Posts tagged ‘Connections’

When the heart feels abandoned

Post 111 Life is struggle

Abandonment of the heart can be physical and emotional. Ignoring the heart’s calls for help when it physically hurts is physical abandonment. Ignoring the heart’s need for connections is emotional abandonment.

Physical abandonment can be felt more immediately, and ignored calls for attention can lead to impairment of heart function. Physical abandonment can also lead to extended impairment throughout the body.

Emotional abandonment is less immediately noticeable, but it afflicts the body over time if relationships are not nourished. Emotional abandonment is serious, but less ominous.

Physical impairment of the heart can come from improper care of the body, emotional turmoil that is excessive, or genetic weakness:

  • Less can be done about genetic weakness; however, genetic weakness does not condemn a person to heart troubles. An emotionally strong heart can triumph over genetic predisposition to heart troubles.
  • Emotional turmoil that is excessive strains the heart’s functioning. Heartache that leads to depression or restrained emotional connections can cause impairment. Overly excited outbursts of emotion—positive or negative—can disturb heart function over time and lead to weakening the heart’s rhythmic beating.
  • Improper care of the body that leads to impairment of the heart is described in the blog posts “Heart attack secrets” and “Things that harm the heart”.

Physical abandonment of the heart is usually done without understanding that our actions create havoc in our bodies. Choosing to care for the heart involves rethinking choices and habits.

Emotional impairment of the heart can develop because of hurts experienced as a child or young adult, by heartache that is too profound, and by religious teachings that extol martyrdom. Emotional abandonment of the heart is as serious as physical abandonment, but its marks on the body are less pronounced. Its marks are mainly on society and family.

Whether abandonment of the heart is physical or emotional is less important that the fact that the heart can be abandoned. Abandonment of the heart is a sad thing that is reversible and worth fixing.

Note: This post was delivered to me through my heart’s connection to Spirit. Heart pain is worth checking with a medical doctor when it is continuous.

Heart Wise

Heart wise

To be heart wise is to be tuned into your heart’s understanding. The heart, the intangible heart, knows the need for connections, for heartfelt connections, and it will push you to create these connections. Listening to your heart’s guidance is living life wisely.

Heartfelt connections are filled with forgiveness and desire for understanding. These connections offer acceptance and support. They fill relationships with warmth and they encourage openness and attention.

Heartfelt actions are not always kind, but they are felt deeply. The actions reflect inputs from past and present pressures so that the actions are not purely heart present. Heartfelt actions that are hurtful cause guilt and remorse. Heartfelt actions that are plagued by tiredness are sometimes stilted or delivered with incorrect intention. Feeling love does not guarantee heartfelt actions that reflect the true feelings.

When actions are consistently unkind, the connections require reconsideration. Unkindness mainly comes from a place of not-love. When the source of a relationship is forced connection or deception, heartfelt actions are difficult to perform because the heart knows the truth. The mind can pretend, but the heart knows.

Heart wise connections bring sincere satisfaction and grounding. They require investment of time and determination. Heart wise connections are not necessarily easy nor are they without turbulence. What they are is truth: truth from the heart.

Connected blog posts are “Matters of the heart” and “Giving your heart away”.

How to fill an overextended heart

Post 111 Life is struggle

Sometimes we overextend our hearts by taking on the problems of too many people or by concerning ourselves with people whose lives aren’t connect to our own (like the lives of celebrities) or by harming our hearts with negative emotions such as despair, worry, and alienation.

The overextended heart might seem too full, but it is actually too empty! It is unable to feel personal feelings of love and sympathy, because it is focused elsewhere. The love and sympathy for family members and close friends misdirects and leaves “holes”.

These unfilled holes contribute to lack of patience, unfocused attention, and unfulfilled promises and expectation with the people who are really important. The holes produce a sense of emptiness, which some people “fill” through attachment to addictive substances or behaviors. The holes remain empty though, begging for filling through acts of love and caring towards family members and close friends.

If our hearts are overextended, how do we find the way to fill the holes and fulfill our hearts? Each overextended heart has been overextended in its own individual way, so general guidelines can only be partially applicable. An Energy Guidance Complete session can help you if you feel the overextension is too hard to tackle alone.

Here are general guidelines to fill an overextended heart:

  • If you follow the private life of one or more celebrities, vow to lessen their importance in your life and take tangible steps to remove their comings and goings from your daily life. Remind yourself that these relationships are not reciprocal: the celebrities are not interested in you.
  • If you feel despair, worry, and/or alienation too often, there are many things you can do, such as bringing a pet into your life, bringing more plants into your environment, spending time in nature, pushing yourself to meet with friends, talking to family members, exploring a spiritual connection.
  • If the holes in your heart have led you to cover them with immersion in addictive substances and/or behaviors, you most likely need assistance recognizing the emptiness side of your addiction. The overextension caused by addiction might be too hard to escape alone.
  • If the holes in your heart are ignored through workaholicism, volunteerism run amok, or desire to remain aloof from the needs of family members and friends, the future might bring you events in which you will need the help of others, but the others won’t be there for you. Invest now in friendships and close relationships to prevent heartache later. (Read the post “Investing for a rainy day, the good and bad news”.)
  • If the holes in your heart are fluff-filled by self-absorption, your connections will become diluted over time. The first step is to recognize that you are too focused on yourself and the next step is to practice empathy for a loved one who is very different from you. When you feel that you have built up your relationship to this person, choose another loved one and work at feeling happiness for this person’s life events. The more loved ones you connect to, the more holes will be filled, and the joy in your heart will be able to overflow.

An overextended heart is reversible when it is acknowledged and addressed. Each cause of heart overextension requires different work, and some causes are harder to overcome than others, but they all can be overcome.

Living with a heart filled with love for one’s close friends and family brings balance to the world!

Note: This post was delivered to me through my heart’s connection to Spirit. Spirit offers us love and kindness whenever we are ready to receive them.

Your soul is longing for connection

Each of us has a soul that was endowed when we were born. This soul of ours knows our true self and our abilities and gifts. Somehow, life takes us away from the soulful connection, and to regain it takes dedicated effort.

In the book Faith–A Wisdom Poem Sharing Spiritual Connection, we are guided to reconnect with Spirit through reconnection with our souls. The reconnection takes focus and awareness. Here is an excerpt from Faith about reconnecting with the soul:

Faith–A Wisdom Poem Sharing Spiritual Connection provides a path to soul reconnection and connection with Spirit. It is available here: 

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Real Connections

Harvey

Investing for a rainy day, the good and bad news

This blog post is not about investing money. It is about investing in what’s around you—in friendships, in committed relationships, in neighborly relations, in family, and in the community. Investing in these important relationships is investing for a rainy day at its best!

Good News: Investing in family, friends and community builds a safety net

“Investing in friendships and giving and taking from friends is nourishing. Investing in relationships is natural and is needed to live a balanced life. Investing in family—children, children’s children, siblings, cousins, and so on builds a network of support that is reliable. Investing in communal activities builds a network of support that nourishes and strengthens the individual community members and the collective group.”… from “Oneself—Living”.

Investing time is necessary in order to build a safety net for when life becomes difficult or too hard to bear alone. Often, people put work obligations before obligations to family, friends, and community. This behavior has become acceptable in society, but it is short-sighted. The more a person gives to the relationships that truly matter, the more protection from the surprises that occur in life. Of course, a person must perform work obligations with an enthusiastic spirit and with focus, but work obligations should be one section of life, not all of life.

 Good News: Investing in family, friends and community supports good health

The more people invest in their relationships and community, the more balanced their health. Time spent with people who are meaningful creates memories that enrich beyond the moments in which they occurred. Positive memories are better, but even negative memories create experiences that build and nurture if the negative experiences are within the realm of realistic disagreeable treatment. In other words, interactions with family members, friends, and community acquaintances do not always have to be positive for the investment to be worthwhile. Learning to negotiate the varying needs of the various people is balancing.

Tip:

Choose a community betterment activity that excites you so you’ll want to participate. If you enjoy the arts, volunteer at a museum or in an enhancing-the-neighborhood project. If you prefer working on your own, volunteer with community building or cleaning projects. There are enough volunteer opportunities to suit all personalities.

 Bad News: Not investing is unwise

“Non-investment in relationships with others leads to loneliness, sadness, aloofness, insensitivity, and unsureness. Non-investment in friendship—foolish. Non-investment in marriage—incorrect behavior. Non-investment in intrafamilial connections—mistake. Non-investment in neighborly relations—short-sighted. Non-investment in societal obligations—selfish thinking.”… from “Oneself—Living”.

The less people invest in their relationships and community, the less balanced their health. Simple as that.

Conclusion

Investing for a rainy day means being prepared for whatever may come. Rain is not negative, but it can cause a change in plans. The same is true for changes in health, family structure (through births, deaths, divorce, etc.), and societal balance. Being prepared means planning ahead—making sure to invest in the connections that truly matter.

To purchase the book Oneself-Living, click on the book cover: 

Listen in! Energy Guidance Complete on the radio!

Hear me talk about Energy Guidance Complete on Speak Up Talk Radio at http://www.speakuptalkradio.com/renee-rothberg-speaks-up/ or on iTunes at https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/speak-up-talk-radio-network/id1109775369?mt=2

The host of the show, Pat Rullo, asked about my journey to Energy Guidance Complete, and we discussed the effects it has had on my life. We focused on my work with individual people, on aging and the book Samba ‘til the End, addiction to screens, the sense of superiority and its effect on conflict, my food blog, and the importance of building connections.

Listen in and let me know what you think. I’m excited about sharing Energy Guidance Complete with a larger audience!

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